Thursday, October 30, 2008
"You're not very good at this, are you?"
First off, who decided that the speed limit on the freeways should be 65 MPH? How would I go about establishing a Proposition to change that? Maybe I could call the Stiles girls. I bet they'd get it done!
Second off, who decided that we can't talk on our cell phones when we are driving... (OK, this one is rhetorical, I actually voted for this law, since I think it's a good law, but... can I get just one freebie???)
I don't have enough time in my days... so I have to multi-task and do it FAST (thus phone talking and speeding)!
Today I got pulled over for the 3rd time in the last few months... uh oh. I can tell I am getting old and less attractive, because I no longer get out of tickets... my prettiest smile is failing me miserably! I am also pretty certain my flippant and caustic personality doesn't work well with cops! I used to be sweeter... it worked better!
Today I was going 84 mph on the freeway and I got pulled over, lights, siren AND the megaphone were used. And, once I pulled off the road, I had this conversation:
Cop: Do you know why I pulled you over?
Me: Well, I could probably guess.
Cop: Do you know how fast you were going?
Me: Ummm, pretty fast, I guess.
Cop: Did you see me before you sped past me?
Me: Obviously not, or I would have slowed down.
Cop: You're really not good at this, are you?
Me: Not really, I think I am supposed to cry, right?
Cop: laughs
Me: Turns out, I am really not good at that either. I am sort of dead inside.
Cop: What?
Me: Are you going to give me a ticket?
Cop: Yea.
So, I WAS speeding (twice) and talking on my cell phone once. I am woman enough to admit it.
Here's what is unlawful in my eyes... I had to pay $358 for going 61 in a 45 in Chino. Are you kidding me??? I am pretty sure in this economy I could buy ALL of Chino for about $325!
I wonder how much the going rate is for Santa Ana? But, more importantly I wonder how much more than that I'll have to pay for speeding there!
I hope no one wanted a Christmas present!
Also, did any of you know that there are additional propositions on the ballot (not just Proposition 8)? Who knew... :)
One of them is Prop 4... I am not even going to pretend to know the semantics of it, but the ad they are running says "Think outside your bubble..." Is this really a good tactic to get someone to vote the way you want??? It's sort of... patronizing, to say the least.
And, Prop 2... really, who cares about chickens!?! I don't mean to sound heartless, but CLEARLY we have bigger problems with our state than worrying if the chickens get a penthouse before we turn them into chick-fil-a nuggets. Don't they have ridiculously small mental capabilities anyway? Do they know how little room they have? I mean really? I bet we could easily confuse them… Let's just put on some loud music and make them think it's squishy because they're at a concert! We can't afford to pay more for chicken; especially with the going rate of speeding tickets! CLEARLY the economy is in dire straits... I mean I just paid $358 for ONE speeding ticket, we must have it rough!
Tuesday, October 28, 2008
WeekS in Review... Oct. 13 - whatever today it is.
I went to Saint Rocke to see Sharon Little, Schulyer Fisk and Matt White. It was a fun concert and a really cute venue in Manhattan Beach (thanks Morgs for finding it). But, we had to go through some rough parts of town. Most people would say they didn't want to live there. But, not Robin, she said "If I lived here, I would go to CVS EVERY day." (I love Robin, she is such a dork sometimes). - For those of you who don't know CVS is a drug store, nothing to get excited about, but the most high class place we'd seen for a while. We stopped at one of them to get candy (of course) and took it to the concert. Diz turned to us and said "Why do I feel like I am at the movies???"
Then I got to go home to Texas! Yipee. Chloe got baptized. I can't believe she's already 8!!! She was so cute! After her baptism we went to the Larson School Carnival. My sister Kimberly's kids are OBSESSED with Chick-fil-a. It's cute. Anytime there is chick-fil-a they all rave about what a good party it is. The cow mascot was at the fair and my nephew Ethan turned to me and said "it's the cow from chick-fil-a, I KNEW he'd be here!" Maybe you had to be there, but it was SO funny.
But, the best part of my trip was the part where my mom tried to set me up with Aaron, the guy who does their pond. Sure, he did know quite a bit about fish and algae, but he had a long grey ponytail and tattoos, lots of tattoos, but not the cool kind, the naked pin-up lady kind AND he was old! Apparently, it has come to this! My mom tried to ho me out to the gardener. Fortunately for me he was married!
And, then we had a BBQ and frolic at the beach. Aaaahhhh... I love the beach.
Which brings us to tonight... we had the cutest activity for mutual. We went to the Heritage House, which helps single mothers get back on track. We threw a Halloween party for the kids. And, I have to say, I REALLY REALLY REALLY wanted to keep all the kids! Plus, I was pinky sworn to do two things I seriously did not want to do, but agreed to because I LOVE my YW and I'd do anything for them. 1.) I joined Facebook although, I am still VERY unsure of the whole thing! "Tag Me"; and 2.) I agreed to read Twilight... and join team Edward??? Or Jacob??? But, I (along with Jen Andersen) don't like anything middle-earth or majestic or outer world. And, I am not into Romance Novels, so I am a bit tentative about the vampire love story... but...
So, there you go mom... the most recent update on my life, with photos and all.
Monday, October 27, 2008
Is it November 5th yet???
I receive supernumerary emails EVERYDAY asking me to volunteer for Prop 8 stuff. Today I received one that stated that we could and should wave signs EVERYDAY from 5:15 PM to 6:30 PM and then I received another stating that we that we could and should make calls EVERYDAY from 6:30 PM to 8:30 PM.
So, here's the deal... I REALLY NEED A HAIRCUT and I don't think it can wait until the 5th and I don't think that my hair dresser wants to wait until 9 PM to give me one... and CLEARLY I feel guilty about wanting to get one, but I am starting to look real rough!
So, I guess I am NOT over being guilt prone.
Crap, I guess that also means I am probably still not a good communicator when it really matters.
Which means all those years of retail therapy did NOT actually heal me... nor did they fix the economy (much to my chagrin).
Screw it, this is how I am, I'll just have to own it.
Plus, now I can just throw on sweats and I have a Halloween costume - a homeless looking chick, maybe if I hold a cup people will actually give me money.
Friday, October 24, 2008
Forget the Rooster!
Tuesday, October 21, 2008
It's all fun and games...
The things I do for my girls!!! I love them enough to dress up as a mechanic in the name of their favorite activity... "where in Fashion Island is your leader?" There was a mandatory "incognito" policy strictly enforced by Debra Bendheim (who I both love and have a healthy fear of).
It's a good thing that Reyes Construction has EVERYTHING I need to borrow for every goofy activity or party that requires my attendance!
And, although this activity was a little painful, it was WAY less painful then the activity a month ago when Debra made all the leaders line up and gave all the girls water balloons, one of which was actually a regular sized balloon filled with water (not the tiny water balloon kind they had when I was a kid) that hit me square in the face! Now, that sucked.
Monday, October 20, 2008
Remember When...
Clearly I was wrong...
It's almost Tuesday...
Wait for it...
It may happen...
Tuesday, October 14, 2008
Sunday, October 12, 2008
Week in Review - October 5-12
So here we go… week in review for October 5 -12.
The 5th was Adam’s birthday. He is my older brother. He turned 36? Anyway… he is RAD. When I was little he would bend me in ways that only carni-folk could bend, in the name of wrestling. He was so industrious. Almost every game we ever played was created by Adam using only very few props (there was either-you-jump-off-the-roof-into-the-pool-or-I’ll-push-you, tape ball, pillow fights in which I never received a pillow only he and all his friends did, there was that time he made me get on the side of the van and then he catapulted me off into the palm trees) aaaaaahhhhh, memories. Sweet memories! And, there was that time he burned a hole in the carpet and made me sit on it and told me if I moved he’d kill me! I think I sat there for like 5 hours… MAN HE WAS MEAN! But, so much fun! I still remember the day he blessed Haley – he was so nervous and proud. It was the day I decided I wanted to marry someone just like him (but maybe slightly less abusive, but only slightly!) Happy Birthday!
First thought. I had NO IDEA Paul Newman was hot!
I go to Vegas WAY too much for someone that can’t drink the kool-aid, so to speak! Last weekend I went for the third weekend in 2 months. And, I saw a NKOTB concert. For those or you who are not cool that is New Kids On The Block. A guy in my office asked me “Are you serious? Why?” To which I replied, that I am not sure I like NKOTB, but I am sure I like my friend Morgan and I am sure she really wanted to go, so I went. It was ridiculous… but, so much fun!
“I don’t own a black bra, so I had to borrow one from my roommate. And, it turns out she is a 38 C. I, however, am not a 38 C, so does anyone need me to store anything in here for them? There is plenty of room.” (She literally pulls out a cell phone, money, credit cards, I.D. lip gloss and keys from the borrowed bra.) – Kate’s friend in Vegas, Jessica Rice
“Ed Hardy is for dorks. Rich dorks.” (Morgs sent me the link to this blog that a friend had sent to her and I kept trying to get the name of the person who generated this funny quote, but I couldn’t find it, I am attributing it to some funny chic in P-town).
We were listening to the song Samson, by Regina Spektor and I am exclaiming how random, but good it is and then Robin says this: “I have totally heard this song. I heard it on Liz’s blog. I don’t know who Liz is, but she’s married to Collin and they seem to have a great relationship.”
Then, later in the week, when we were encouraged to go “viral” she said this: “I don’t have a blog, I am way to busy stalking other people’s blogs to have my own!”
Thursday, October 9, 2008
"Family... isn't it about time..."
Since the day I was born the best thing about me has always been my family. I am an extension of them. I would die for anyone of them and have often prayed to switch places with each of them at one or more times throughout my life. They are my world! I would do anything I could to protect my family.
I, admittedly, am a person whose choices are largely governed by my religious beliefs. These beliefs are not always popular with the world, most often not. And, I will have to say that at several points in my life I have chosen to take a religious stand that opposed that which I believed to be constitutionally sound, but have never regretted doing so, not even for a moment. But, today, I am proud to say that I believe my actions and beliefs are in accordance with my personal interpretation of The Constitution.
I have always believed that there is one God for all people and that this God was omnipresent during the triumph of the American Revolution and creation of The Constitution. It is my belief that the Founding Forefathers of America created this country under the direction of God. I have never quite understood why we can't admit that proudly or why some want to remove it from the Pledge of Allegiance or U.S. currency, when it's been a part of our country's history since its foundation. I think it was John Page who wrote to Thomas Jefferson after the signing of the Declaration of Independence "We know the race is not to the swift, nor the battle to the strong. Do you not think an Angel rides in the Whirlwind and directs this storm?"
In my opinion, marriage has always been directly linked to religion. In my opinion, it always should be. Marriage is a divine institution. This belief, is not only mine, nor is it one for the minority of the population. According to the California Secretary of State website, on March 7, 2000, the people of California voted on Proposition 22, a proposal to enact a state "Defense of Marriage Act" as an initiative statute. The text of Prop 22 reads: "Only marriage between a man and a woman is valid or recognized in California."
Prop 22 was ratified by an overwhelming majority of California voters, prevailing by a 23-point margin. Statewide over 4.6 million votes were cast in favor of Prop 22 comprising 61.4 % of the vote, while opponents garnered only 2.9 million votes. Final vote counts revealed that Prop 22 won in 52 of California's 58 counties.
Unfortunately, earlier this year the California Supreme Court overruled this vote and declared Prop 22 unconstitutional. In 25 days (on November 4, 2008) we will be voting again to uphold the original wording of Prop 22, defining marriage to be solely between a man and a woman. I strongly encourage all of you who live in California to vote Yes on Prop 8, in order to do so, you must be registered to vote by October 20th.
I also strongly believe in equality. I believe that equality provided the primary reasoning and power behind the strength that led the fight to formulate of our country and justify the battles that created it, defining our freedoms and liberties. But, it is important to note that Proposition 8 will in no way rob any persons of that equality, those rights and privileges governed by our country. In California, the law provides for marriage-related benefits to be given to civil unions and domestic partnerships. Prop 8 DOES NOT in any way diminish these benefits. But, it will hurt our children and it will hurt our church. (For more information see http://www.protectmarriage.com/ , http://www.perservingmarriage.org/ and www.newsroom.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/eng/commentary/the-divine-institution-of-marriage.com ).
There is A LOT riding on this proposition. The bain of the The Family : A Proclamation to the World created in 1995, defends this very type of issue. As I understand it, because of the strict Anti-discrimination laws in California, any church who does not allow all types of legalized marriages to be performed in their chapels/churches would risk losing their tax-exemption status, having huge implications for the LDS church as a whole.
I am pretty sure that all 15 people that read my blog are LDS and well aware of my beliefs. And, I am pretty sure that about 13 of you live outside California, (but I guess it's a public blog, so you never know... I did get those random foreigners commenting on my blog last year!) And, for those of you who DO live outside California, you can still help! Please donate your money to the cause at http://www.protectmarriage.com ! It will not only affect Californians, but all U.S. Citizens and more importantly the church as a whole. I mean, we built our own $20 million dollar temple and we've taken then brunt of the economic drain from illegal immigrants, so could some citizens who live in the other 49 states throw us a bone here! Seriously!!!
P.S. To illustrate how strongly I feel about this cause. I have just agreed to wear a "Vote Yes on Prop 8" shirt to DISNEYLAND tonight... which is tantamount to walking the gauntlet, if you ask me. But, nonetheless, if I die, I'll die justly having supported Prop 8 (for a minimum of 4 hours this week :)! If I don't make it through the night, I love you all. If I do, I am going to try it at The GAP for 4 hours next week... JUST KIDDING!!!
However, I am willing to "get a bumper sticker for my car and risk getting my car vandalized" (to quote my dear friend Holly Boyd), but I don't know where to find them. Anyone know???
Wednesday, October 8, 2008
Keep it to yourself!
First, I got a pedicure on Monday. It was my treat for running FOREVER IN THE RAIN (don't worry, I am over it - not). Anyway, I have naturally UGLY feet. About a decade ago I was told by Quentin Spitzer "your toes are SSSSSSOOOOO long, I am pretty sure you could palm a basketball and play Olympic Sports with them." (Seems weird that I still remember this... I am over it, I swear. But, then again maybe not). But, seriously, I'll admit they are the ugliest puppies you'll ever see. There are SO many calluses on each of my LONG toes... and while the running has been good for my legs, it has been bad for my feet. So, anyway... back to the matter at hand... I went to get a pedicure... and the Asian lady who was kind enough to paint my toenails went ON and ON about how ugly my feet were and what did I do go running in the rain??? As a matter of fact lady YES! I did! I tried to get some sympathy by telling her about my marathon. Didn't work. She waxed on and on and on and I am telling you, I barely understood anything else the lady said, but she kept going off about how these were the ugliest feet and I was never going to get any love and I might want to think about a manicure and then MAYBE I could get a boyfriend. So, I finally said "shut up lady, I am paying you!"
Ok, I didn't, but I should have.
Second, I am SO over hearing about how we are all going broke! Yesterday, I saw multiple news sources recite how retirement accounts have lost $2 trillion dollars! Yikes. So, here's the deal, my dad is the smartest financial guy I know. I blindly follow his advice (and that of my financial planner, whose advice I follow mainly because I am paying him!) Anyway, for years now I have been putting the maximum amount possible into my 401K plan, which will yield me the highest tax benefit. Yesterday my statement informed me that I had lost 24.83% this quarter. Yikes. I am not trying to sound like McCain/Palin here, but without knowing an extremely large amount about EXACTLY how the economy ebbs and flows, I know this is not pretty! But, I also read that our economy (although in dire times) is only down 33% from it's all time high (trust me, I get that this sucks) and in 2002, it had fallen 38% and then bounced back within 5 years to an all time high. So, I am hopeful. But, if my hope is dashed, I am totally moving in with my parents! (Because, it would be your fault if I am broke dad!)
Maybe, I should just stop reading the news.
Thirdly, my dear sweet friend Kara sent me an email which stated the following (and I quote exactly) "You should freeze your eggs." Ok. I know that this advice only comes from a sweet and concerned place. And, one of frustration as well. But, this is the third time in my life I have been given this advice. The first time I was 26 and my boss' friend asked if I was married, if I had kids and if I had thought about freezing my eggs. (Mind you this was the first and last time I ever saw this man - thankfully). Second, was my sister Jennica. ENOUGH! This kind of pressure is definitely NOT helping me. If I could get knocked up legitimately, I would! But, since I can't I am just going to eat enough to make me look pregnant. Oh wait... that's not a good idea, right?
So, here's the conclusion. I don't have enough money to freeze my eggs. I don't know how much it cost, but I can't imagine it's a cheap process and I just lost 24.83% on my 401K - remember? Plus, my eggs are not going to be much good - have you seen my feet not the best gene pool (feet wise anyway)?!? I have come up with the perfect solution. I will get 10 foster kids. Foster kids come with a $1000 a month payout from the government, yielding me $120K per year (which will make up for the loss in my retirement) and CLEARLY being that they are severely neglected and/or abused, they are sure to have low standards for a parent and really unattractive feet, which will make me feel better about myself. Done and Done! I am SO smart!
Tuesday, October 7, 2008
Important Message!
"If you get an e-mail with 'Nude Photos of Sarah Palin' in the subject line, do not open it. It might contain a virus. If you get an e-mail with 'Nude Photos of Hillary Clinton' in the subject line, do not open it. It might contain nude photos of Hillary Clinton... who might contain a virus."
Sunday, October 5, 2008
"... second time in thirty-two years..."
And, while it was a laudable effort on behalf of the St. George Marathon personnel to make us feel like real athletes... BITE ME!!! You have got to be kidding me!
Yesterday I ran my 2nd marathon... and it SUCKED! Seriously! I finished with purple hands and chattering teeth.
I have to admit, I knew I wasn't going to enjoy it when I stepped out of the bus IN THE RAIN in the 5 AM hour!!! Then I had to stand there FOREVER. But, luckily the marathon committee handed out "rain coats", which apparently in Utah is code for K-mart-plastic-shopping-bag-that-you-can-put-over-your-head-if-you-want. Unfortunately it was STILL raining and STILL 40 degrees and we all know how much I hate 1.) being cold; 2.) eating anything with cheese in it and 3.) dating... in that order.
So anyway, the first marathon I ran, I was surprisingly chipper given the fact that I had voluntarily decided to run 26.2 miles. But, I don't think I smiled even once during the first 26 miles of this one! Seriously, I was miserable. And, I would like to say that I have recovered... but, truthfully I haven't my body HURTS and it sucks.
But, there were some moments that, although never made me smile, might possible make the rest of you laugh. During the run my mind vacillated between a bunch of really important thoughts, which were:
1.) I wonder if my ipod could electrocute me?
2.) I could never be a pioneer - extreme exercise in miserable weather conditions is SO not for me.
3.) I am pretty sure my shorts are see-through!
4.) This is strange, I wonder why my legs aren't sore... oh wait, I haven't been able to feel them since I had to take of my sweats before mile 6!
5.) How can I tell if I have hypothermia?
6.) Whose stupid idea was this? Surely, it wasn't mine was it?
I am pretty sure that I am WAY too old to run anymore marathons. Now before any of you tell me that your 95-year-old papa ran a marathon last year, I am not saying that someone my age is too old, CLEARLY, I know this. And, I was remind of this fact almost as much as I heard the "... second time in thirty-two years..." line, I heard about the 5 octogenarians that were signed up to run the race, 4 of whom I am pretty sure past my sorry trash!!! (Please note, I was also beat by a man who ran barefoot! NICE. But, I believe my time although 30 minutes slower than my first marathon, was still faster than Oprah's... if she even REALLY ran a marathon... did anyone even see her start... or finish... or anywhere in the middle??? I only saw pictures of her little minions surrounding her...)
Congratulations also to M.E., Dan and Julie who finished their first marathons! Brett for killing your 2nd in the Heavy-weight division - so good to see you. And, Melissa who finished her 5th. (Celine, Douglas told me that you were thinking of doing it again next year... I knew you'd NEVER retire!)
And, then there was Cafe Rio... twice! YES PLEASE!!!