RaNdOm ThOUghTs...

So, I am sitting in my office, ridiculously tired for some reason, which is making me think of ALL sorts of strange things. Mostly REALLY random thoughts and questions. So, I am going to start spilling them...

1. How long does it take to make a bloody couch? I mean, I ordered this couch in January and it's March... REALLY... 4 weeks to ship? From where, Africa? I don't get it, I really don't get it, but I am so over being couchless... what is taking so long???

2. Is it odd that my roommate and I LOVE to watch the biggest loser while shoveling cereal into our mouths? A few weeks ago we woke up to go running and then came back and watched it for 3 hours... on the floor... SINCE WE DON'T HAVE A COUCH... while eating obscene amounts of Golden Grahams and Lucky Charms and we came to a few conclusions: 1) We both kind of want to go on the Biggest Loser (but, just for the boot camp aspects); 2)"fluffy" people must be more emotional, right? Why are they always crying? 3.) It is really NOT flattering to put overweight people in REALLY small shorts and a jog bra... I mean, come on! They already have to see their weight broadcast in shining lights AND use a truck scale instead of a normal one, it all seems a bit inhumane! 4.) All of the guys on that show have bigger boobs then me... I mean A LOT bigger.

3. I decided this weekend (while I was babysitting Isaac Moore - age 2) that guys are really quite darling when they are 2. They like to cuddle, they smile a lot, they say very little... so, 3 is when they go downhill?!? - Just wondering...

4. If you have a garage sale at 11:36 AM, not very many normal people will come... but, if you have a garage sale WAY earlier... A LOT of not very normal people will come.

5. SNA and SAN are very close airports, in that if you transcribe the letters wrong one becomes the other... but not so much in proximity to one another or to my house. So, try to double check your airline tickets if you are coming to visit me. But, if I love you enough, I will still take you to SAN at 4 AM, if you mess up.

6. I see kids (mostly kids that belong to my friends) and I want to take them home FOREVER! I KNOW... it's no good! But, I can't help it. The thing is, I am pretty sure their moms would just come get them and then think I am REALLY crazy.

7. My roommate, Wendy, is RAD! Want to know why? She snorts... I mean often and loud. AND I LOVE IT. She runs! (This may seem like a stupid thing, but in the 58 years I've lived on my own, none of my roommates ever went running with me... most of them wouldn't even walk with me... but Wendy will go running with me at 9:30 PM on the back back, when I have too much energy.) She's AMAZING! She has very bendy toenails, but they don't break easily. She's LOVES cereal, I mean L-O-V-E-S! She's totally fine sitting in the camping chairs, SINCE WE STILL DON'T HAVE A COUCH... plus, she volunteered to go to Kenya and run the couch over to our house by herself so it would get there faster!- Now that's love. She can't understand anything our Landlord says either (which makes me feel brighter). She's SO easy-going - what a blessing! Sometimes she has crushes on guys and then she can't remember who they are!

8. Most people do not get as excited about things as I do... except maybe Claire. I think that's one of the things I like most about her. Plus, she'll jump on the bed with me.

9. One out of five times I try to figure out my TV/DVD/IPOD-hybrid surround sound home theater system, I can't. So, I give up and try again later.

10. Paula Abdul is on drugs frequently, especially when she is judging American Idol. And, she has had SOOOOO much plastic surgery, she is starting to look an awful lot like one of the Jackson 5... maybe all of the Jackson 5.

Ok, I think I should actually get back to work... it's not like I don't have a ton to do!

Halted...

Ok, so I had such grand ambitions of posting my whole house, room-by-room, day-by-day in a week or so... but, I can't... I regret to admit it's not done yet. My progression is halted! I still need to paint the bench that goes in the front yard. (By the way, does anyone want to build me a swing?!?) I am waiting on some towels to come in from Pottery Barn for my bathroom. We are not getting our couch until March (yikes! - It's a good thing Wendy and I are not big T.V. watchers). The office still needs to have the entertainment piece painted and put together. I guess Wendy and I could post our bedrooms, but we'd have to clean them... which hasn’t been happening lately.

But, mainly for me this is where I am halted as far as my bedroom and the office is that I have ZERO nic-nac type items?!? What is wrong with me?!? (This is rhetorical, DO NOT feel the need to post your ideas about this question)! I mean, I am a girl, I am supposed to have dozens of decorative accessories, even boxes of them that I bought, but can not put out because I have too many. Nope! Not I. I think I am missing some girly gene that requires me to feel compelled to buy these items. I mean, when I moved I had to buy dishes, I didn't have ANY. (My old roommate, Cori, has 5 SETS!) What girl doesn't own dishes? And, do you want to know what kind I bought - white ones, plain ole', no pattern, no frills, white dishes! Just this weekend Robin and I were at the mall and we went into Crate and Barrel. Robin was in paradise, I think I started itching. There were so many plates and vases and… I had to escape to Banana Republic, where I could do some REAL damage.

Which leads me to this thought… with the exception of my vast wardrobe and my penchant for collecting make-up (yea, I don't know why I do that either), I am not all together that girly! I've been thinking about it a lot lately and I think I am missing some very important feminine genes. Here are 5 reasons why:

1. I work in a Construction Firm… around ALL men (and I kind of fit in, I can totally hold my own). My mind is pretty permanently in the gutter. Every joke I know is pervy! I own a hard hat and a safety vest... I mean, if I wanted to be one of the Village People for Halloween, I already have a costume! Not too feminine.

2. I am dead inside. I hardly ever cry. I am so unemotional. Seriously! I feel like Cameron Diaz in 'The Holiday' or Zach Braff in 'Garden State'... I mean I am supposed to cry when my car won't start or I see a bug or when things don’t go my way or SOMETHING... but, I don't. I hardly ever cry. I just go running (how very masculine of me), which is an odd female reaction. But, it's mine. And, I own it.

3. I don't pick up on hints very easily. When people are mad at me, I never can look at them and hang out with them and know. I just assume they are having a bad day and carry on with my life, as per usual. It seems presumptuous that I would have any effect on someone's day-to-day life, right? And when guys like me... I usually have no idea until they verbally say "I like you." (I could provide a list of references for this claim, but I won't). That not picking up on not-so-subtle hints - that's a male trait right?

4. I don't think ALL babies are cute. I am sorry, but I don't. A lot of them look sort of raisin-esque to me. I mean, I'd venture to say I only think about 30% of all babies are REALLY cute. (Don't get me wrong, I LOVE kids... and my future kids will definitely fall within the 30% - because they'll be mine, just as ALL my neices and nephews fall within this minority, because their also mine - AND because they ARE all cute...) but, most of the time, I just lie and say babies are cute because it's easier! I KNOW isn't that HORRIBLE?

5. I don't have any decorative home accessories! - What the...

But in my own defense, I am rather verbose, I tend to mother everyone and everything in sight (to a fault, I've been told), I ask a TON of questions, I am really good at multi-tasking and I am rather affectionate - these are girly traits right? Plus, I do LOVE to shop for clothes and shoes, so I hoping my excessive collection of jeans makes up for the lack of feminine genes I seem to have missed somewhere along the way.

P.S. I WILL eventually post every room in my house, it just might take a while. Stay tuned.

Moving Day!

So, this weekend I moved! I LOVE LOVE LOVE my new house. It's to die for cute. But, I am exhausted! Seriously, moving is ROUGH!

We had MANY great moments, really funny times. But, first I must say that I believe vehemently that I deserve accolades on how freakishly strong I am AND I deserve an honorary Class B Commercial Semi-truck driver's license for being able to back out the flat bed truck without munching any other vehicles or people! And Wendy deserves snaps for having the most flexible toenails that the world has ever seen. And, Aaron deserves snaps for being an eye doctor in-training AND an on-call Podiatrist AND having the most hilarious singing voice EVER. Helaman was the master of the heater (until Wendy turned it off and the “general warmth" issues began. Erik and Mike fell in love, but wouldn’t hug… much to my chagrin. But, I did get called a princess by Erik and received a nice backrub from Mike. All that pointing my finger to tell the boys where to put things really put a lot of strain on my back! Brian has an impressive freakishly long torso, one that people should pay a dollar to see at the carnival and one we documented for good measure. Robin was notably the most powerful persuasive Moving Nazi, but a REALLY fun and well organized one, I just wish she'd let us sit down JUST ONCE. Aaron says she’s not overbearing… so I am sending her to his house next! Together Robin and Brian made the most worthless painting assistants EVER, constantly shattering my visions and dreams, but also providing entertainment. And, Marci has such great list writing skills. Ok, go ahead... let me hear how impressed you all are...

Here are a bunch of thoughts, conversations and quotes from moving day...

~On Saturday evening I was sick of looking and feeling like the semi-truck driver I was, so I took a shower, it was 100% cold and all I had was facial cleanser - the end... no shampoo or conditioner or body soap. Have you ever taken a shower using entirely facial cleanser? I don't advise it, it's creepy and expensive!~

B. Esplin: "What color are you painting this room?"
Ali: "Moonlight Dance."
B. Esplin: "Um, is that what you call white?"
Ali: Nope, it's grayish white.
B. Esplin: Ok, so it's white.
Ali: No, it's definitely not white.
B. Whatever, it's white. And, I am pretty sure you’re going to need to do another coat.
Ali: Stop shattering my dreams!

B. Esplin proving to us that he DOES in fact have "girl legs and a man torso".

~"You know how most people OCASSIONALLY go to the mall and sometimes they find things that are cute and sometimes they buy them, but sometimes they don't. I ALWAYS go to the mall and I don't think I have ever seen something cute and NOT bought it. I think I bought everything that was EVER sold" - Ali~

Robin: "I've decided to throw away all this and give these things away!" (as she totes a large garbage bag full of various and sundry things that I purchased - SINCE EVERYTHING THAT WAS EVER SOLD I PURCHASED!) Thus, earning her the new moniker "Moving Nazi". Wendy and I both had a healthy fear of her.

Aaron: Why do you have Murray's Pomade?
Ali: I read somewhere it was supposed to be really good.
Aaron: Yea, really good for black people. Do you see the guy with the afro on the lid? What in the world do you need it for?
(I had no response, because I was doubled over laughing, he's right, it's totally made for African Americans.)

Helaman: Why do they [Wendy, Robin and I] keep saying 'Remember when...' to things that happened like 5 minutes ago?
Aaron: That's just what they say before they say ANYTHING else.

~"Look how well all of our movers are getting along. Do you think they'd all hug each other if I asked them to?" - Ali ~

~ As much as we LOVE LOVE LOVE the house, there are a few 'money pit' issues, so we had Marci make us a list of issues to take up with our Argentinean Landlord - who neither Wendy or I can remotely understand. The list was as follows: "(1) bugs, (2) bathroom paint job??? (3) leaky toilet (4) heaters (5) hot water - warmth in general." ~

Erik: "Can you please stop having conversations, I really don't want to be here all day." (He CLEARLY didn't like that Robin and I had to debrief everything every 10 minutes.)

As soon as the 46" TV was hooked up (thanks to Aaron) all the boys became a little worthless. I came down the stairs from my all facial cleanser shower and they were sitting in camping chairs watching football... I was really tired and so sad that in my house there was not a stitch of furniture, but there was a big ole' TV. It totally looked like a bachelor pad. The boys did not understand why I was gravely disappointed and one of them said "what's wrong, you have 3 remotes, what could be a bigger turn on than that?" Wendy and I held them all at the same time and concluded that none of them turned us on at all! And, even after my long tutorial, I still have no earthly idea how to turn on my highly impressive TV.

Today I was so tired my boss told me that I was walking like an old lady! It was an exhausting weekend. But, I laughed often and hard thanks to the aforementioned situations and Aaron's singing, which never ceased to make me laugh out loud.

But, even after the pain and anguish the move inflicted on us, I am thinking of moving again next weekend, just so I can spend the entire day with these 4 again.

Can you really blame me?

Confessions...

1.) I'd like to be able to categorize my blog entries, but I am really not that bright.

2.) I'd really like someone to come assist me with the aforementioned task. Anyone? Anyone? Rob? Brian? Lindsey? Bree?

3.) I really liked Nick Lachey's post break-up cd. I know... deplorable right??? But, it really is quite good.

4.) I also like Ashley Parker Angel. I know... even more deplorable right??? But, he kind of looks a lot like my first boyfriend and so there's that to be considered.