To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Tuesday, February 2, 2010

Man vs. Wild

So, my guy friends are SUPER into the Man Vs. Wild T.V. show, which, as you can imagine, I have never seen (well, unless it's authentic title is actually "The Bachelor"). But, last weekend they were telling me about it and I almost threw up a little in my mouth. The "Man" has to "live off the land", which apparently means drink water out of the carcasses of dead animals and left over animal dung. But, anyway, somehow they have concocted this "wild" plan to have their own Man vs. Wild experience... IN OUR BACKYARD.

Before I carry on with the story, let me tell you all a little about my backyard. There are exactly ZERO bushes, much to the chagrin of my drug dealing neighbor who I found clinging to my fence the other day, wearing a head lamp and "searching the bushes" for some sort of boggie-man who was apparently out to get him (that crazy Meth is one awesome drug, so he says). There is exactly ONE tree. There is also some weird storage thingy that has been given the moniker of "the chicken coup" because, well, as you can imagine, it looks like a place that only chickens would inhabit. In this "chicken coup" there are THREE beach cruisers and a little kids BMX bike (which reminds me, I have been meaning to ask my roommates about that), a couple surfboards and a BBQ, oh and a kite and some beach toys. Our backyard is approximately 20 feet wide and MAYBE 40 feet long. There is exactly ONE hammock, TWO little benches with SIX adorable little outdoor throw pillows, TWO little iron tables, with FOUR cute blue chairs, ONE Mexican lime tree (which I have excluded from the tree list, because it was purchased at Home Depot last weekend, it resides in a pot, making it more of a plant in my mind, and it has sprouted exactly ZERO limes, to-date) and one little Jasmine tree (which is also a plant, right?!?) and a lot of other plants, that my cute little green-thumbed roommate has placed outside, making it look like the Garden of Eden... Therefore, it is not exactly a WILD backyard.

Anyway... today Wes and I had this conversation:

Wes: wendi is down for our Man vs Wild event in your backyard. We are thinking that we should be dropped off in back bay and have to find our way to your house! Oh, and we have to live off the land, so if the land happens to provide us with a random bbq and food in the middle of nowhere (your back yard) that would be awesome. Of course we will throw some money your way!
Ali: That is quite a proposition. A funny one.
Wes: lol. We are so excited! You can camp with us too. Oh and Ben said it would be cool if in the middle of nowhere, there happened to be a projector screen so we can watch man vs wild!
Ali: I HEART camping. But, only in those places where you can put quarters in and take a shower.
Wes: lol yeah, that's my kind of camping
Ali: This was so funny... It MAY or MAY NOT show up on my blog!
Wes: lol oh I hope it does show up! I love being in your blog.

Dearest Wes,
Your wish is my command.
Love, Ali

4 comments:

Unknown said...

Ali, the least you could have done is given me a minute to correct my grammar. I was so excited during our conversation that my sentences look like they were scribed by a dyslexic three year old. Thank you for that. Do not let her fool you, that back yard is full of spiders and other gross bugs.

See you at Man vs. Wild: Ali's Backyard

MY FOUR SONS said...

I throw up a little in my mouth with that show too! My boys love it! They are also planning a Man vs. Wild trip this summer with their dad. I don't get it. I told them I would drop them off, go to my nice, comfy home for the week and pick them up if they survive!

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