Sunday, April 3, 2011
No Thank you.
There are so many things I keep trying to love. So many people (and society in general) make me believe that I am supposed to like the following, But.I.Just.Can't: 1. Lipstick. Sure, it looks lovely. But, I hate it. I hate wearing it. I hate the feel of it. I hate having colored lips. I just hate it. But, I have about 15 tubes of it. Because, every once in a while I try to convince myself that if I get just the right shade, I just might... Nope, still hate it. HATE. 2. Jewelry. Again, I love the look of it. And, sometimes I can wear a watch and sometimes I can wear a necklace, but hardly ever at the same time. Earrings stay on for like 4 minutes tops. And, bracelets stay on until I get to work and have to take them off because I can't type with antything swinging from my wrist. But, I have an entire dresser full of jewelry. 3. Plugs. I am not talking about the kind that bald guys get (though, I am not sure I am a big fan of those either, since I loved shaved heads, but...), I mean those RIDICULOUSLY big holes that teenagers (mostly) put in their ears. RIDICULOUS. Seriously. I read an article recently about a musician that got totally tatted up at a young young age so that his only career path would be music. But, I just can't believe that there are that many spots open for musicians that make much money. Not a good idea. 4. Cheese. Woof. Gross. I know, it's weird. I was called anti-American the other day. To which I refuted that I was a bi-centenial baby born in Washington D.C. Both are true. I am American alright. So, take that. 5. Smart Cars. Oh.My.Gosh. I still can not believe that those cars are not jokes. They are also very very ridicuolous. 6. Male Speedos. I am a swimmer (or at least I was). But, come on! The male Speedo seldomly covers the butt crack of any male. Plus, they are just so small and tight, and... the water is usually so cold... and... ugh... it's one of the hardest parts about coaching. So.much.crack. Ugh. In my ever so humble opinion, the world would be a better place without these things. I sure wish people listened to me. Anyone, really. But, if the last 2 weeks of my life have taught me anything, it's that no one does.