To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Friday, October 2, 2009

Stuff White People Like

Yesterday my Hispanic friend with a Book of Mormon name sent me this link:

Such a funny website. We went through the list and discussed what I agreed with and what I didn't. I promised him that I would blog about it. But, there are currently #128 things on the list. Helaman warned me that my blog post might be long, but assured me that if I kept it entertaining he'd read it. I didn't talk about all of them... thank goodness. Hecru, I'll try to keep it entertaining. This one is for you.

I decided that I would put my answers in categories. I came up with 3.

Category #1 - "Guilty" (These are the things listed on the site that fit me perfectly).

#126 - Vespa Scooters - The other day I almost bought one impulsively while driving by a garage sale in Huntington Beach. But, then I thought it might be kind of an expensive impulse buy, plus we don't have a garage, and the chicken coup is pretty full.

#116 - Black music that black people don't listen to anymore - two words... LIONEL RICHIE

#102 - Children's Games as Adults - I MAY or MAY NOT have instigated a game of Red Rover at Youth Conference last summer because I MAY or MAY NOT really actually like that game. And, no MAY or MAY NOTs about it. Two of our almost 29-year-old friends DID toilet paper our house last weekend. I blamed the Beehives in my ward (sorry about that). The boys seemed stoked that I mistook them for 12-year-old girls... WHATEVER.

#77 - Musical Comedies - Enter GLEE. (I am by no means done blogging about my MAD LOVE for GLEE... I will blog more about it later... wait for it...)

#57 - Juno - Well it's SUPER GOOD. All people SHOULD love it.

#56 - Lawyers - I HAVE to love lawyers. I am the spawn of a Harvard educated lawyer. It's in my blood. Luckily my dad hasn't practiced in decades, so I am allowed a bit of leeway there.

#55 Apologies - I am a PROFICIENT apologizer. It's chronic and habitual. And, sometimes I am not even truly sorry, truth be told. But, I am a people-pleaser, so I don't want anyone to be upset with me EVER. Thus, I apologize, even when probably unnecessary. I can't help it.

#54 - Kitchen Gadgets - Again, not an option, my mom works for William-Sonoma. I HAVE to have a Le Crouset pot... and a Kitchen Aid... and a cupcake tower... and a Panini maker... and a ...

#51 - Living by the Water - Yup, I am in. Sign me up... twice.

#45 - Asian Fusion - Did someone say Pei Wei? I have been to Asia... all over Asia. And, with the exception of Thailand, we white people CAN NOT handle authentic Asian food, our stomachs are weak!

#31 - Snowboarding - Pretty true. I don't think I have ever seen and non-Caucasian's snowboard... well.

#27 - Marathons! - Well, I don't ACTUALLY love them and at the same time I do. It's weird...

#26 - Manhattan - it's RAD!

#25 - David Sedaris - He's WICKED funny!

#9 - Making other people feel guilty about not going outside - well, yeah...

Category #2 - Things I MAINLY agree with as being indicative of most "white people" preferences, but not true for me... mainly because I am weird.

#128 Camping - If there are showers and plugs and it's RIGHT ON THE BEACH or VERY NEAR SAND DUNES, sign me up, otherwise, I am out!

#125 - Bob Marley - why is that?!?

#118 - Ugly Sweater Parties and #29 - 80's Night - Every holiday party in Texas is an "Ugly sweater party" a lot of people have those in the South. And, I total remember nights in the 80s, but white people really are the only people that get a kick out of making these into activities.

#108 - Appearing to enjoy classical music. I get that this makes me seem uncultured, but I don't general enjoy it much... sorry.

#120 - Taking a year off, #105 - Unpaid internships, #72 - Study Abroad, and #47 - Art Degrees. - A year off what?!? Worked since I was 17. No thanks. I will take money over experience! Sorry, it's the truth. Only if you have parents that will pay for you to "study abroad". And, no one is going to ask for your art (or music) degree, therefore, you might as well NOT pay for one. Get something useful and practice your talents on the side.

#64 - Recycling, 60 - Prius, #59 - Natural Medicine, #49 - vintage, #48 - Whole Foods Market, #41 Indie Music, and #32 Veganism/Vegetarianism, #15 - Yoga, and #6 - Organic Food. If it's convenient (I know, but I am super LAZY). Hogwash. It's dumb to pay more money for something used than new, WEIRD, WEIRD, WEIRD, WEIRD, and only for people who would rather pay more for the same exact stuff!

#101 - Being Offended - True. Stupid white people... mostly only chics. I can provide a list of white chics I have offended, some repeatedly, most in my family, none intentionally, yet somehow that doesn't seem to matter, because they'd all rather be offended than not.

#96 New Balance Shoes - Mostly true for older white men, like my dad, who has never owned any other kind of sneakers now that I think of it.

#83 - Bad Memories of High School & #17 - Hating their parents. Probably true, but I always LOVED them both.

#75 - Threatening to move to Canada, #62 - knowing what's best for poor people & #8 - NOT hating Barrack Obama (because apparently we are all afraid of being called racist). Canada Smanada, they eat too much cabbage there. No idea how to help poor people, but I always stick money in those cans outside the grocery store. And, Barrack Obama talks a good line... but, hasn't been able to back it up with much yet, so...

#71 - Being the only white person around & #7 Diversity. I am Mormon, so... This would appear untrue for most of us. Sorry, but it's true!

#65- Co-ed Sports & #61 - Bicycles. I HATE THEM BOTH! With the exception of the beach cruiser and beach football.

#39 Netflix - True. Except for my brother-in-law used to manage the online division of Blockbuster, so I got that instead, in support of my family... turns out my brother-in-law and sister have Netflix... SLAM!

#40 Apple Products - Apple is RAD! But, with the exception of the 6 ipods I have purchased (what?!? Turns out I lose things easily) I have a DELL computer, which I LOVE (and get made fun of profusely for) and a Blackberry, which I also LOVE.

#37 - Renovations/Shows about renovations - Blah... unless it's flipped out (which is way more about the CRAZY OCD of Jeff Lewis and way less about renovations), I am BORED!

Category #3 - Really? This is true only for white people? Please bless these things are of interest to all!!!

#113 - Halloween! - Who DOESN'T love love love Halloween?!?

#103 Sweaters, #86 shorts & #84 T-shirts - REALLY?!? Everyone should love ALL of these! And, I think non-Caucasians wear all of these, just usually in a size or two smaller (females) or larger (males) than they should!

#99 Grammar - Good job white people. Everyone should care about it!

#28 Not having a T.V. - I know ZERO white people who don't own a T.V. NOT EVEN ONE. But, truth be told, I don't know ANY PEOPLE who don't own T.V.s! Who would NOT own a T.V.??? - That's just plain silly!

#4 Assists - This one cracked me up! Probably true, but definately not true of ENOUGH white (or any other) people.


Kari said...

I've blogged about that website too, but not as extensively as you (only about how it's so true about me when it comes to grammar and how I don't dance in public)! I'm so glad you're not a Mac fan. I'm a PC, so SHOVE it, Apple snobs!!

Party of Five said...

Sad, but true, I have a sister-in-law that doesn't a TV. It is a travesty I know!

Ali B. said...

Wendy, is that the one you call "the weird sister-in-law"?

Amanda said...

speaking of marathons, did you run yours yet?

Ali B. said...

This weekend! Its supposed to be a balmy 30 degrees! Yikes! Pray I don't die!

The last Unicorn said...

I love you... except for I have to change your mind about the whole yoga thing :)